I can't tell you how much I hate cancer. I'm getting real reeeeal sick of it. It just hit Carlee, my third sister to get it. I have only three sisters. Three of my three sisters have gotten cancer.

It hit Lindsay about four years ago. Katie finished up treatment one year ago. Now, about two months ago, Carlee was diagnosed. All with lymphoma. Lindsay and Katie had the exact same kind of lymphoma: Nodular lymphocyte-predominant Hodgkin lymphoma. Carlee's is different. I'm not even sure exactly the type but I think it's peripheral T-cell lymphoma.

Katie and Lindsay went through treatment and were sick as can be. It was a horrible, horrible time. Now it's happening all over again, but worse. About a month ago, I took Carlee to one of her chemo treatments. They took her vitals and found that she had a fever. So they put her in the hospital for two days and postponed chemo. Well about two weeks ago she had another fever. They put her in the hospital for ten stinkin days. She has been so so weak and tired and feeling like crap all the days. They found out that the fever was being caused by the cancer, meaning that the two months of chemotherapy hadn't been working and the cancer had spread. They switched her to a different kind of chemo and it. better. work.

I have never been so scared in my entire life. And I'm pretty sure everyone in my family would say the same thing. I hate watching my best friends (who are my sisters) in so much pain and not being able to do anything about it. It's a horrible, helpless feeling. It doesn't seem fair that this is happening. Obviously. Nothing is fair, that's just how life goes. I know other families go through a lot harder things but man, I don't know how they make it. 

It's hard to trust that God knows what He is doing, but it's really the only thing that can get us through this. If I didn't know that God was aware of our situation and that He has a plan for each of us, this hard time would be a whole lot harder.

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